I do see this to a certain extent whenever I’m in the city with the baby. In the Upper East Side, there is a surplus of moms and nannies pushing Bugaboos (a stroller starting at $700) and nothing else. I see them in cafes chatting with one another, looking cool and posh. In the Village, I see more eclectic-mom types like myself, and so on. In my little neighborhood though, it’s not as common –yet. Moms in my area come in all shapes, sizes, and colors that they don't fit a specific niche. (Also, I haven’t really met any other moms that I associate with on a regular basis aside from the moms I’ve met in daycare.) So I can’t really comment on the types of moms out there. Nonetheless, I think moms are always on the lookout for other moms that they can bond with. When I’m at the playground, I definitely scout around to see which mom I can chat up. Likewise, I’ve been approached by other moms who try to pick me up.
One time, I was at our local playground (conveniently located at the end of my block) when this woman starts to chat me up. She was Chinese, probably about 5-10 years older than me, and had an 10-month old baby.
Her: Oh hello. How old is your child?
Me: He’ll be 12 months in two weeks.
Her: Wow, he’s walking already! Victoria (gesture to child in swing), can’t walk yet. When did he start walking?
Me: A little before he was 11 months old. He’s still very wobbly (and as if to demonstrate, rockstar baby trips and falls).
Her: Are you home? Or do you work?
Me: Oh I work, I just got out of work a little early. How about you?
Her: I work too, and she’s in daycare.
Me: Oh me too.
Her: Which daycare?
Me: Oh he’s in X daycare on 10th st.
Her: Oh where is that? Do they have a lot of white kids in there?
Me: Uhm..yeah, it’s pretty mixed.
Her: How much do you pay a week? Is it expensive? Are you able to afford it easily? Etc..
At that point, I got kinda weirded out by her personal financial questions, so I bow out of the conversation and turn to Jakey by saying “oh do you want to get on the slides now? Come on let’s go…” Since then, I’ve seen the mom around but I don’t think she remembers talking to me. I always see her chatting up other parents though!
I myself haven’t had the guts to approach other moms other than commenting on how cute their kid is and doing small talk. I think it’s really hard find other moms your age that a) have a child close in age to your child; and b) have the same interests as you. I'm currently trying to 'pick up' the mom of this cute kiddo that rockstar baby plays with in daycare. I haven't had a conversation with her yet (since she does her drop off/pick up earlier than I do); but since she dresses her baby kinda punk-y like sometimes, I keep thinking we'll get along.
I really wish my friends and I had kids at around the same time. We'd have built-in playdates and we already know we get along. A close friend I have with kids moved to Georgia (thanks Trish!) But at least there's Antonion (my friend Sol's baby) --I think by the time rockstar baby hits two, they can actually start playing with each other and actually realize it (as opposed to just staring at each other).
Until then, I'm still on the prowl. I have yet to see another mom wearing Vans with skulls on them or a shirt with a band’s name on it. Is that too much to ask? Should I put out a personal ad?