A typical morning in the life of back-at-work rockstar mom and rockstar baby (although most days, there is only one disaster at a time). Part I can be read here.
6.30 - Alarm rings. Hrmph.... Hit snooze. Go back to sleep.
6.41 - Am awakened by rockstar baby’s babbles and gurgles.
6.42 - Go to baby’s room and play with him. I change him and hand him over to the hubs.
6.46 - Hop into shower while the hubs prepares bottle.
6.55 - Get ready. Hm...should I put on my clothes on now or later? Wear robe while still getting ready? Hm.. decide to put on pants. Will finish dressing later.
7.06 - Take over the feeding. Rockstar baby is bouncy and giggling. Easily distracted. I tell him stories while I feed him.
7.25 - Baby finally finishes his food! Yay! I burp him over my shoulder.
7.26 - Rockstar baby takes a big burp. What follows next is a steady stream of throw-up. I let out a high-pitched squeal! In my head, I'm going fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck! I hold him at arms length as he continues to upchuck. Vomit is going down my back.
7.27 - I am a deer caught in headlights. It is endless. I'm never seen him throw up this much before, especially since he rarely spits up in the first place. Silky, warm vomit pools onto my lap and meets the pool of vomit that has already collected around my butt. Vomit starts to drip from the glider onto the floor. I scream some more I think.
7.28 - The hubs comes up. Looks at me. Runs backs out to grabs gobs of paper towels.
7.29 - We put the baby in his tub on the floor. He laughs and thinks he’s playing boat. Surprisingly, there is no throw-up on his clothes. Just on his toes.
7.30 - I peel off my clothes. Of course the day I don’t wear a robe is the day he throws up on me. All over my just-picked-up-from-the-cleaners suit pants which I haven’t worn since month 5 of my pregnancy. Oh, and my newly dry-cleaned sweater. And bra (which was ratty anyway, so that wasn't much of a loss).
7.31 - The hubs and I clean up the carnage as baby enjoy his "boat." The hubs takes my pants and rinses them off.
7.45 - Still cleaning up the carnage.
7.46 - The hubs leaves for work.
7.47 - I change the baby, put on his clothes and leave him in his bouncy seat.
7.51 - Yikes! I’m running really late. I pick out clothes, change with a quickness, and rush to gather my stuff.
7.55 - Really, really late now. I always aim to leave by 7:35 am. I scoop up baby. We trudge downstairs, and I start to buckle him in his car seat.
7.56 - He squirms and yells. I hate getting strapped in! During the struggle, I feel some dampness on his butt. I pick him up and smell his butt. Of course. OF COURSE. Rockstar baby just did a poopie.
7.56.31 - Hm…split-second decision: change him here? Or have daycare change him?
7.57 - Argh!! I can't drop him off daycare all dirty! Mad dash back upstairs to change him. I change his poopie diaper and slightly poo-stained pants.
8.06 - Okay, buckling him up again and we are off! YES! We are officially OUT THE DOOR!
8.09 - We’re moving, we’re driving along. I sing songs to the baby and he makes grumpy babbles in his carseat.
8.13 - Ah! We are at the daycare! I drop him off and do my customary chats with the caregivers.
Caregivers: Good morning!! How are you!
Rockstar Baby: Ba ba ba ba! (He bounces up and down as I pass him to one of the ladies).
Caregiver 1: What time did he eat this morning?
Me: He ate around 7 am. But he threw most of it up. I think he just ate too fast.
Caregiver 2: Aw!! He’s not sick is he?
Me: Nah. He just got too excited. He might gets hungry earlier than usual.
Caregiver 1: No problem.
Caregiver 2: Oh where are his diapers and wipes?
Me: What? He’s out of diapers?
Caregiver 2: Oh we put it on the board than he needs them.
Me: Oh crap! How many diapers does he have left?
Caregiver 2: He has 2 right now. Three wipes left in the box.
Me: Argh! Crappy crap. I guess I have to go back.
Caregiver 1: You don’t have any spare diapers in the car or anything?
Me: No…. er. I’ll be right back.
9.31 - Walk into work. Am late. I hate being late. Oh well. What can I do?
Congratulations to my friend Sol who just became a mom! Welcome to the wonderful world of motherhood!